Happy That You Came

Astounded by your presence

Though I’m so happy that you came

That night we met seemed infinite

The stars lighting our walk along the way

I wish it never ended

Every second we shared was perfect

Our lives seemed to impede abruptly

Suffocating our fresh love far too quick

Days felt like months

Just as months felt like years

An unexplainable sensation

Changing my dwindling hope into tears

Holiday season once again

As cheer floods everyone’s brains

Regardless of how you ended up here

I’m just happy that you came.

Discrepancies

I lay perplexed at what I see and hear

Change spoken in the masses

While nothing seems to change each year

Constant banter of who is better

Who is more fit for the job

Creating a greater distance between us

Fueling the tank for the next senseless mob

I am amazed at antics I see on the news

Embodied with everything but optimistic views

We place blame wherever we deem appropriate

When our overwhelming catalyst is clearly ourselves

Our morality hidden in plain sight

Thinking somethjng only works if it sells

We raise awareness for countless issues

As we see our interest disappear overnight

Changing what we fight for so abruptly

Fearing that there is something else more just or right

I’m grown old enough now

So I’m aware I don’t play the most significant role

My mind does me a favor by stopping any delusions

For I know my discrepancies will forever be out of my control.

Below

I feel like I’m at my lowest, like I’m failing a test

Bullets of insecurity piercing a once intact vest

My mind scrambling as I search for my sanity

Only to be restarted every time I face reality

My feet are stuck in quicksand

With no help in sight

I’m blind to everything but my misfortunes

Getting knocked out every round of the fight

Depression is apparent

Providing the heaviest weight on my chest

Eyes shaking trying to fall asleep

Tonight I can hardly rest;

I’m tired of hearing that these feelings will just pass

Covering up with a smile that is barely attached;

I don’t want to live my life in sorrow any longer

With ominous shadows lurking that keep growing stronger;

My only way to be free

Is to pick apart and work on each feeling

Wide awake counting every mistake

With my eyes still glued to my ceiling.

Self Doubt

Self doubt can be draining

I do my best to persevere

I make resolutions I try to keep

After the beginning of each new year

I have trouble trusting others

Though I think I just don’t trust myself

Always feeling that I’m updatable

Blaming faults on my mental health

I feel confident in myself periodically

Even if it quickly disappears

Insecurities I’ve dismissed for too long

Piling on to other outlandish fears

I’m easily effected by remarks I’ve heard my whole life

Even though I don’t really show it

A permanent mask plastered to my face

Covering emotions as I see fit

I’ve learned to treat anxiety with deep breathing

My depression with music maxed out

My bipolar with medication daily

Which in turn somewhat helps that self doubt

I’ve come to a realization

That has somewhat brought me comfort

As I learn to love who I am today

I’ll start to heal from some of this hurt.

Tomorrow Can Always Bring Sunshine

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think money and greed ruled us all

Behind everything around us is something out of our control

Cultures collide and morals end up in the dirt

People ditching loyalty as long as they finish first

Our crooked ways have continued for way too long

Lyrics written about our world today played as a somber sound

I know there is good, but it just slips away in front of our eyes

What was once so promising, may now lead to our demise

More smile from careless sins

As our moral compass thins

A road once paved for progress

Has been disheveled I must attest

We were put here to love

To teach from our mistakes

Days overcast from clouds above

Not willing to change for all our sakes

I fear the day has finally come

Those who swear to stand up just turn around and run

Politicians promising we will never again fall

All while diving us with hate and an invisible wall

Time will continually move forward

Who knows maybe we’ll all be okay

Tomorrow can always bring sunshine

I’m just hoping it’s not as dark as today.

Just Go to Sleep

What if I told you your life was repeatedly planned

That as you slept at night

Your brain was was crafting a beginning and an end

So every day that you perceive

You’re in control, but not as it may seem

When you sleep poorly, you’re tired

You’re battery is not as full

You miss out on what could have done

With your day dragging along quite dull

When we lose sleep or are sleepless

Our sanity starts to fade

Quality sleep that we’ve missed

Contributes to drifting more insane

Imagine if sleep wasn’t a recharge

More a meeting for your time

When your following day

Is mapped out inside your mind

That everything you see, you’ve put there

Learned images and sounds

When you slumber later that night

You regroup and plan with less bounds

If we do not sleep

Our imagination may wander too deep

We might start to learn too much

As panic begins to gush

I am aware of my surroundings

I hope until my edge of time

Even though I help to plan it

I never have the power to rewind.

Cold October Night

Part of me wants to scream

Yet I stay quiet as a mouse

Too many lives inside my head

Too many to even count

I second guess what is right

I do the same for what is wrong

My fork in the road is infinite

Left lost, unable to find my way home

My anxiety appears out of nowhere

A 180 degree turn from glad to sad the same

One small glitch in my own matrix

Causes my stimulated brain to cave

My attention span lasts as long as this line

Wait what was I saying before

Oh yeah, how life changes by the minute

Inviting yourself to a civil war

Time still sneaks under your nose

Even when you’re up, you’re still on the ground

With every stride forward, you take six steps back

Feeling helpless trying to turn things around

I hope my calling will one day shine

It doesn’t even have to be that bright

All I know is today is another day gone

As I blankly stare into a cold October night.

I Imagine

To paint my own dream

Well this is what I’d imagine

A world with no currency

Oh that would be something

Where everyone was equal

Something not just written on paper

Where the likes of all mankind

Would always assist when asked a favor

The grass always green

Bright blue sky with a cloud or two

A fellow citizen volunteering to hold the door

As you greet them with a thank you

A place where minds don’t think alike

Though it is used as a strength

Where everyone goes above and beyond

Extraordinary enough to any length

The television is used less

Cell phones rarely seen in hand

A society less suffocated

By the propaganda of each crooked brand

More wildlife preserved

Less endangered species every day

A world full of opportunity

One where we’d all certainly want to stay

I feel it’s never as easy to give

As it certainly seems it is to take

I imagine if I ever had this dream

I’d never actually want to wake.

Provide the Proof

Quiet voices often make the most noise

Leaving people blinded and stricken of joy

All our paths may lead the same way

We all bleed the same at the end of the day

With politics changing daily and war overseas

Along with less fortunate people begging for spare change on their knees

The weather changes rapidly

With droughts and floods and more

People left high and dry

Unknowing of what’s in store

More information is available

Problem is we don’t know what is true

With social media plaguing our purity

Scaring people into thinking Armageddon is coming soon

Simplicity is now nonexistent

Everything comes with a price

There’s less pure of heart people daily

For you’ll get nowhere just being nice

I don’t say that to be cynical

I just believe that logic has the most truth

If you find examples we’re not doomed

I’d love to be shown the proof.

At a Loss for Words

When the barrel doesn’t feel right

So you just continue to cry

I pray you find the strength

To open up your eyes

You bring joy when you’re present

Whether you know it or not

You’re a person to go to

Advice without even a thought

You carry so much bullshit

Refusing to unload

Feeling your life caving in

Convinced every option will implode

No one is perfect

Every person has their flaws

Work towards getting better

Hell you can even hit pause

We mistake greed for goodness

We pour our hearts out just to bleed

We brainwash ourselves unknowingly

Just so we’re not the bottom seed

We forget that being at our lowest

Gives us the most room to grow

Then before we even know it

We’ll forget we were so far below.